


"You weren't here when I needed you the most"

by Jamilton_and_Lams



Series: Angstober 2019 [3]
Category: Mo Dao Zu Shi
Genre: Gen, He feels that wwx abondoned him, Lan sizhui feeling angry and betrayed, Very sad boys, in sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-11-27 15:22:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20950592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jamilton_and_Lams/pseuds/Jamilton_and_Lams
Summary: "A-Yuan" he takes a shakey step forward but stops when he notices A-Yuan shift away from him. "A-Yuan?""My name is Sizhui! Who are you to call me A-Yuan with such familiarity? You are not my father nor my mother. You did not raise me."





	"You weren't here when I needed you the most"

"Gege I want to grow big and strong just like you" 

Wei Wuxian grinned at the young toddler who had wrapped himself around his leg.

"Well there's a secret way that will help you even faster - do you want to hear it?" 

The child nodded solemnly and wei Wuxian reached down and plucked him off the ground. 

"You have to buried - like a vegetable. Like a radish!' 

Wei Wuxian carried him over to the plot where fourth uncle was digging and unserimously dropped him in the hole. 

"Now; my little radish. It's time to pack in the dirt!" (Neither Wei Ying nor fourth uncle see Wen Qing arrive until it's too late)

****

He's dead. Jin Zuxian is dead and it's all his fault. Wen Ning was under his control and he had… he had…

It's only when he sees Wen Qing in front of him and sees the needles does he realise what they intend to do. 

"No!" He tries to shake off Wen Nings grip but he's too strong. He then turns to Wen Qing pleading with her instinct to keep her baby brother safe. "They'll kill him A-Qing. They'll kill you all!" 

She smiles sadly at him mutters something, but he doesn't hear what; the drug already pulling him under.

****

Wei Ying scans the burial mounds desperately but they are empty. (He misses the child, fast asleep, hidden at the base of a tree)

They are all gone- most likely dead. If they are (which they are, he can feel it ) he will seek vengeance on all the sects for hurting his family. 

He passes where fourth uncle made his wine and hurries past the kitchen. He pauses momentarily in front of the dining area. He closes his eyes and can still hear the laughter and conversation. He wipes his tears away and resentment growing makes his way out of the burial mounds.

****

It's only later he realises A-yuans body wasn't with the rest. When the battle is over he tries to make his way back to the burial mounds alone, shoving off any attempts of help from Lan Zhan. He can't trust anyone right now he needs to get to A yuan. He needs to…

Jiang Cheng stands in front of him and he knows he's failed. 

It's all he can do is pray that someone will find his precious A-Yuan, the child he thought of as his own, before the cold of the coming winter claimed him.

******

It's 13 years later when Lan Zhan finally tells him he had found a yuan and saves him and raised him that he dares hope.

The sweet Sizhui have had gotten to know over the last few months is nowhere to be found. He searches Cloud recess desperately. A-Yuan. His A-Yuan is _alive_. 

It's only when he catches a hold of the group of Lan Juniors does one step forward to tell him that Sizhui was with the rabbits. That he wanted to be alone. 

But Wei Ying wasn't listening. His son. His son. _His son_.

He has the route to the rabbit huts memorised and within minutes he's standing at the base of the hill. 

He can see the white robed youth sitting at the Base of a tree and takes off in a run. "A-Yuan!" He can feel the tears in his eyes. Alive. Alive. Alive. Al-

The face that turns to him is stony and cold.

Unforgiving.

He stared at Wei Ying for a moment before nodding his head in acknowledgment. "Senior Wei." 

"A-Yuan" he takes a shakey step forward but stops when he notices A-Yuan shift away from him. "A-Yuan?"

"My name is Sizhui! Who are you to call me A-Yuan with such familiarity? You are not my father nor my mother. You did not raise me." Wei Ying stumbles back at the outburst of anger.

A-Yu- Sizhui stands and gently places the rabbit down before turning back to Wei Ying with a fury that reminded him of Wen Qing blazing in his eyes. 

"I waited for you. I still remember- I pretend not to because it's easier but I still remember being told to hide in the tree until you came for me. To stay safe and stay hidden. But you never came. You left me like the others. You weren't here when I needed you the most - when my family left to die and you… you chose death over me."

"No…. No A-Yuan… I thought you had gone with them I never knew you were there I came-" 

"Sizhui! My name is Sizhui." The junior turned away. "If you can't remember that don't bother adressing me."

Wei Ying watched as the boy he thought of as his son walk away from him. 

Out of all the reprocsions of his past life this was by far the worse. 

Hours later Lan Zhan finds a somber Wei Ying sitting with the rabbits. 

Months pass. 

No matter how hard he tries he can't coax that bright smile full of joy onto his husbands face again.

**Author's Note:**

> Come scream at me on twitter!  
https://twitter.com/bi_revolutionar


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